Finding the Equilibrium

Perhaps I was too melodramatic yesterday in my reaction to the request that I write carefully for the next few months...but it was an honest reaction - immediate and highly charged. A natural instinct.
However - when in Rome, no?

The argument illustrated for me that while I take my everyday liberties for granted it is also second nature to defend them, even vehemently, when they feel the least bit imposed upon. But, I accept that I cannot possibly know what reality will exist for me in Iran, particularly as a westerner, and in the end I am more than willing to work to fit myself into that reality, however strange or uncomfortable it may seem.

I have such mixed emotions about being American right now; ashamed of my government's choices, broken hearted over their lies, and not wanting to be associated with so much destructive behavior - yet at the same time so very American in my insistence of self and all that comes with that in the western social structure.
The solution is that I must think as an Iranian, live as an Iranian. I will have an Iranian identity card and passport, and for all intents and purposes will be functionally Persian. Whatever equilibrium I need to find between my natural tendency for developing and expressing strong opinion and the social norms and acceptable limits of my next locae will likely manifest organically.
I will figure it out.

My thoughts are interrupted by a sudden thunderstorm as the stiflingly hot air of the last few weeks cools immediately by at least ten degrees, and I know that in less than an hour there will be no electricity. Rainstorms are the natural enemy of the Indian grid. What defense is there when the power lines are strung about precariously from palm tree to fencepost, and so on?
But I've grown used to these things, and simply reach for the candles...as any creature of adaptation would.