Mikham....

Every time I look a bit tired, or don't feel well (which isn't often...but happens to be true today - both issues in full) the women in my Persian family ask if maybe, just maybe, we're pregnant.
This might be annoying for some - I've friends who tired quickly of the immediately-post-marriage questions about when and how many babies would be coming along.
These obviously hopeful questions don't bother me though. On the contrary.

Hamid and I named our future-certain two (one boy and one girl - that's the plan anyway, as if we have a say in the matter) mere months into our relationship, even before we were married (and no, I won't tell what we came up with - and have stuck to all this time, often referring to both of them by name in our conversations...).

We were sitting in a park in Bangalore (one in which you've to pay 50 rupees to enter, a paltry amount, but ironic considering the 'absolutely no sitting on the grass' and 'no running - walking allowed only in designated directions' rules) dreaming up our future, madly in love, and every single child in the area seemed to bring forth images of our own family.

If we didn't have another couple of months in India to contend with I suppose the possibility would be much more than just that - but I can't imagine growing larger by the day while managing the absolute chaos that getting simple things done there can be.

The other consideration, perhaps even more important, is Hamid's adjustment to the States.
We honestly don't know how long it will take us to negotiate his visa, etc. but once we're there there is a house to find, a car to buy, a city to explore (not to mention the nation with all of it's magnificent beauty) neighborhoods to acclimate to, friends and family to make up for lost time with - while getting used to the subtle but impactful differences in way of life from what we've been immersed in together the past nearly-two years.

And then, there's our absolutely mind-boggling addiction to eachother.
I know couples who are in love, but I don't know any who share every waking moment together intentionally.
It's hard sometimes, to imagine fitting another little personality into the equation - although I know we'd manage to fall in love with him too...no problems there.
But sometimes, when we're vascilating between 'should we?' or 'shouldn't we?' in terms of immediate procreation we find ourselves absolutely stuck in the middle.

On the one hand, biology, love, and circumstance all point out that it's absolutely possible in the most wonderful ways - and on the other...well - it's so very permanent. And maybe I'm just a little bit selfish, wanting to keep my husband all to myself for now.

It's still fun to talk about though - and considering the interest level around here, I'll continue to get lots of practice in that area.